Let's get us some real problems, people!

Read the story in English HERE.

Zoé Renault told Le Parisien that she did not want her identity to be reduced to the image of a car or to be associated all her life with a vehicle. "It would be unbearable for me to hear 'the Zoé has broken down', 'we have to get the Zoé overhauled' or 'so and so killed themselves in a Zoé,'" she said.

It's better in French:
« Je ne veux pas que mon identité renvoit à l'image d'une voiture et être associée toute mon existence à une auto. C'est blessant, juste invivable ».

"It's hurtful, I simply cannot live with this."

People live without sight, hearing, arms, legs. You can live with a car having your name, bitch.

DP May 20 One-by-one: The whole story

Letter 1 is from a woman who got knocked up by a "registered sex offender" who is just out of prison. Her son has been raised by her current husband, who wants to adopt the kid. Biodad wants to be part of son's life. Prudie says to go through with the adoption and keep the kid away from biodad as long as possible.
My take: Well, I have a problem with the words "registered sex offender". You see, that doesn't mean much. It could be something like statutory rape when he was 22 and the girl was 17. Americans are so paranoid about pedophilia that they have created all sorts of ways of "protecting" children which give a false sense of security to parents, while keeping them properl roiling. So I'm not prepared to say that biodad is a threat to the child without more info.

And ladies: if you don't want unpleasant men sticking around in your life, don't let them get you pregnant. (Exception for rape there.) Use that birth control, and if it doesn't work, ou still have a last chance to keep him out of your (and your child's) life.

Video letter is so dumb I can barely recap it. There's this guy who thinks the LW is his daughter. Mom says it's not true, but there's a lot of pressure to make the guy happy since someone is terminal. Prudie says something.
My take: pseudo-biodad and his family can shove it. But if you want, there's an easy way to find out the truth: do a paternity test.

Letter 2 is from a person who has been unemployed for a while and gets annoyed when recruiters ask why she's been jobless so long. Prudie gives a good answer for her to give. My take: Duh. Getting peeved is not a way to get the job. Maybe your testiness has something to do with your joblessness.

Letter 3 is from a woman whose... oh, you'll have to read it for yourself HERE. Prudie says that whatever happens, it's not LW's problem, but her husband's (it's his family, you see).
My take: Let's all grow up a bit.

Letter 4 is from a woman whose BF is going out of town for a conference, where he'll meet an old college friend of the female variety who lives in the area. Friend will be spending the night in BF's hotel room, on a couch or rollaway. LW doesn't like the look of this, and wants her to get her own room. Prudie says her jealousy is most unattractive, and that if BF was planning some hanky panky, he wouldn't be telling her about the meeting, let alone the plans for the slumber party.
My take: Prudie is right, but I am puzzled. If she lives nearby, why does she need to sleep over? And if the room is big enough for a sofa or a second bed, couldn't he downgrade to a cheaper room and pay for a second cheap room for the friend? But in the end, LW says she wants the friend to pay for the second room, and that's where the problem is for me. If LW wants her in another room, LW needs to cough up the cash.

DP May 13 One-by-one: Ascension

It's the Feast of the Ascension, so I'm above it all today.

The letters are mostly from women at work, and I have the day off, so hah!

Letter 1's from a woman (?) whose new colleague is having a sex thing with a coworker. Should LW tell the wife?. Prudie doesn't encourage, but can't disapprove either. Prudie makes a stupid pun on "discharging his duties/attending to urgent discharges". My take: It's not really their private life, is it? They are making it about your professional life, they are wasting people's time with their antics, and they aren't doing their work. So tell the boss, not the wife.

The video letter is from a young woman has a coworker who keeps tabs on her as if she were her mom. Prudie says to kindly tell coworker to butt out. My take: Yeah, whatever. Nothing more to say about this one.

Letter 2 is from a young woman who's predecessor in her position has been a big help in doing her new job. Until, at least, predecessor went behind LW's back to submit a (better) project before her. Prudie says to have a sincere and open talk. My take: I guess you could have a talk. But maybe LW hasn't been very good at crediting the Other Worker for her help these six months?

Letter 3 is from a young woman whose fiancé of four years won't bonk her. She thinks it's just a bad habit and wants advice on breaking it. Prudie tells her the truth, that her fiancé has bid problems, they need help, and she should contemplate leavin him, and certainly not get married. My take: What she said. Except I would be a bit more directive: deal with your shit now or I'm leaving you now.

Letter 4 is from a young woman who dreads her college graduation because her horrible mooching relatives have all invited themselves, including her dreadful grandmother, who said that if LW is fat at graduation, she will throw a hissy fit. Prudie gives all sorts of advice about dealing with the insults, and ignores the mooching of the uninvited guests. My take: You're a grown-up. Tell them they're not welcome.

Vivement que Le Parisien embauche des journalistes !

Dans le numéro de ce dimanche 2 mai 2010, dans un article sur l'exportation du cinéma français :

Le promo-real (NDLR : une bande-annonce de quatre minutes)a suscité un vrai engouement.

Promo REEL. Reel = bobine. C'est la bobine de promotion.

DP April 29 All-in-one

The original letters and answers can be found HERE.

Dear Prudie,

I'm engaged to a wonderful man, who happens to be my my supervisor at work. Most of the time he's just so wonderful, but once in a while, particularly at lunchtime, he drinks a wee bit too much. He gets all weepy and emotional and I have to drag him into my cubicle to get him out of sight of my colleagues. As you can imagine, this is seriously impairing my ability to get my job done. Once he got so drunk that he shat in his pants, and I had to race out to Kmart to get him a pair of replacement underpants and tuh-RRRRousers, and missed an important call... which he had the nerve to criticize me for. I am glad that he has stopped going out at night to bars to get drunk, after an incident last year when he hit a deer while driving home from a night on the town.

Almost worse is that although he is totally gorgeous, all the drinking has made him neglect his acne treatment, and he is now covered in zits, which as a dermatologist's daughter I find particularly icky. And in the home stretch to the wedding, he has had his best friend from back home (who will be his best man at our wedding) move in with us. It turns out that the guy is 100% trailer trash, and has come equiped with this huge pit bull sort of dog that he keeps on a choke collar pegged on a short chain in our backyard, which is doing no good for my image with the neighbors. (They already have some strange ideas about us, ever since I put those shit-stained boxers of my fiancé on our clothesline in the backyard... I am environmentally conscious, and the Green Lantern would certainly look askance at me throwing them out, or worse, using our clothes dryer.)

I have to admit that all of this has factored into some serious questioning about going through with the wedding. I even looked up my high-school sweetheart, about whom I often daydream. It turns out that he was run over by a hit-and-run driver last year, so my plan B is off the table. And so, after thinking about my situation, I need your advice about an important matter:

How do I get my fiancé to accept that we won't be putting Stoli on our bridal registry?

Yours,

Blush bride

Mais que fait l'Etat-providence !?!

Lu dans Le Parisien d'aujourd'hui :

Le piège de l’horodateur

Alexandre se souviendra de son entretien d’embauche à Boulogne-Billancourt. Une fois garé [garé ? il y a bien plusieurs stations de métro à Boulogne !], il réalise qu’il n’a pas de monnaie sur lui [il prend sa bagnole, mais ne prévoit pas de monnaie pour stationner ?] pour assouvir l’appétit de l’horodateur. Pas grave, il retire de l’argent, puis demande des pièces en échange d’un billet aux rares commerçants ouverts [Méchants commerçants, pas ouverts quand ça arrange Alexandre !]. Avec à chaque fois la même réponse : « Désolé, mais on ne fait plus la monnaie. Il y a trop de gens qui nous en demandent. » [Alexandre ne pense pas acheter quelquechose à ces commerçants pour obtenir de la monnaie ? Alexandre est bouché ?] Alexandre était arrivé en avance, mais l’heure du rendez-vous pour l’entretien d’embauche approche. De guerre lasse, il se voit contraint d’abandonner sa voiture sans le précieux ticket. [Même pas foutu de mettre un mot d'explication ?] Et ce qui devait arriver arriva : à son retour, un papillon vert orne le pare-brise. Furieux, Alexandre se fend d’un courrier au maire. Sa conclusion : « Je tiens à vous remercier d’avoir créé ce piège [Oui, le gros piège du stationnement payant...] et vous demande de transmettre mes amitiés à vos concitoyens qui sont d’une grande courtoisie. » [Ce sont vos concitoyens aussi... le mot "administrés" aurait été plus adapté.]
F.C.

Dear Prudence, April 22, One-by-one, Rashomon edition

Original letters and responses HERE.

H/T to Shotsie.

LW1:
Dear Prudence,

I've had a successful career in a youth-oriented field. I am a fairly well-known radio host, and have the pleasure of attending many events. I'm also fortunate to have retained a youthful appearance, due to clean living, a balanced diet, regular exercise, plenty of rest, and good genes. And working around young people does great things to help keep me feeling and acting vibrant and happy.

But I've become a bit less happy since a new employee has "discovered" a "secret" that was a secret to no-one but her: the fact that while I may look 25, I'm actually -- gasp! -- 40. Ever since this discovery, I have been subject to nasty looks, snide remarks, and tasteless and offensive birthday "gifts", like hormone cream.

In response to this harassment, I did some digging on my own, and learnt that this young woman's credentials are not quite what she wrote on her CV when applying for the job. For example, she never completed the degree work for the university diploma she claims to have earned.

My question to you, Prudie, is: should I narc her anonymously, or should I make sure she knows just who got her sorry ass kicked onto the street?

Signed,

Older and wiser than that young tramp
VLW: Dear Prudence,

I often visit a friend, but i've begun to think I should put a stop to it. Every time I come over, he can't stop giving me these nasty sidelong looks of reproach. I can't figure out what he's angry about, and when I ask, he says nothing's wrong. For a while I thought it might be about me putting my feet on his coffee table, but I know it can't be that, since he puts his own feet on the table quite often. I used to enjoy spending time with him, because he's usually such a warm and welcoming host, but things have changed so much, I think I'm just going to have to stop stopping by.

My question is: do I just stop going, or do I tell him why?

Signed,

Tabling the question

LW2: Dear Prudence,

Last year my husband and I were in a terrible car accident. A crazy driver decided she absolutely couldn't stand driving at the speed limit one more minute and tried to pass a truck pulling a horse van. She didn't see us coming in the opposite lane, and ran us off the road. I lost the baby I was carrying, and suffer a lifelong visual impairment. My husband lost both legs, and has limited use of his left arm. Our life has been ruined by this thoughtless young woman. I hate her so much, but she died in the accident, so I have no-one to cry out my pain to.

How can I get over this?

Signed,

The criminal got off too easy

LW3: Dear Prudence,

A few weeks ago I did something quite foolish. I hooked up with a guy in a bar, and he took me back to the place he was staying. I had had a few drinks and didn't realize it was not his place, but rather the home of one of my brother's friends, and the guy I was making out with was an old college friend of this guy. Anyway, the homeowner's wife found us making out on the couch, and totally freaked out. I quickly got dressed and left, but since then, this woman has made my life hell. She took the video from her nannycam and has posted it on the Facebook pages of all my family and friends, and has even taken out an ad in the local paper describing me as a harlot and a slut.

I couldn't figure out why she decided to make me the target for her insane hatred until I grilled the guy I was making out with, and he told me she had come on to him several times, and each time he had refused her passes, not wanting to betray his college friend, her husband.

My question to you: Should I fight fire with fire and start posting this info on Facebook?

Yours,

Eye-for-an-eye, Facebook post for a Facebook post?

LW4: Dear Prudence,

I have any number of hobbies, but I'm careful to try to share them with my wife. Despite my best efforts, she shows no interest, and even mocks some of my pastimes.

I'm now thinking of taking up a hobby which I couldn't share with her in any case.

My question is: blonde or redhead?

Signed,

Extracurricular activator