Letter 1 is from a guy who thought he might have a child by an old girlfriend. He told his present wife that this might be the case. Now the child has come looking for him, he is pleased to meet her, but his wife is nutso: I was open about meeting my daughter the first time, but when I got back, she was in tears about my "new family." He now keeps seeing his daughter, but in secret, and he feels sleazy. And how can he introduce her to his sons without making wife freak again?
I say: Good thing you've got a "new family", cuz the old one sounds like you're better off without her.
Prudie says to make sure she really is his kid, and to lay it on the line with wifey, going to counseling if needed.
Prudie says to see a lawyer about getting him out of the house and into treatment.
Score 8/10. So glad it wasn't Cary Tennis answering.
Prudie says first, try to get along, second, dump the surprise party, and third, bla bla bla about the details.
I give Prudie 10/10 just for ixnaying the surprise party. Never a good idea, a worse idea for a very old person, and hurtful to make him think you have forgotten him, or make him live in fear every time he enters a room.
As for the details, Prudie was wrong to indulge the LW. But LW is an doof for thinking that it's important to have the party on his birthday rather than on the nearest weekend. If you want people to come, it's on the weekend, LW. And Prudie's other advice is wise. I do not want to go to a restaurant with you and your swarms of grandchildren. There could easily be about 80 guests: why don't you just rent a hall (with A/C) and get it catered?
|Caption: Just because this is the photo that came up when I searched for "Stepfather". Really!|
Socre 9/10: Sure the kids are ingrates, but just where has LW been all these many years?